IT’S AN HONOR — Ringwood Family Tree

This past spring my mind was spinning around the various ways “we” (all extended Ringwoods) celebrate and honor those we love. I was on a walk with Mellie and my mind’s eye created this little video of the traditional birthday cake with that awesome quarter hidden beyond the frosting and deep within the cake. Mom would give a hint to the birthday celebrant on just where to make that first important cut. With the little ones, her hand enveloped the birthday hand to steady and guide the cut. (Who knew at the time, that tender gesture was more of a treasure than the quarter!) The birthday boy or girl selected the birthday menu and sometimes (yes, just sometimes) there was a “friend” party. Who needed a friend party – we already were the party!

(Reflection … These birthday celebrations morphed into another something-special celebration. I love that Mom created the tradition of hosting a 40th adult-only birthday celebration for her children. Weren’t they wonderful?)

Senior pictures were proudly displayed on the television console and remained until the next in line. Report cards (and assignments) were “signed” by Mom and Dad with either a bold and proud flourish of a signature, reserved for the A grades, or in tiny and disappointed print for the not-so-stellar grades. Each day of my childhood I felt wanted, loved and celebrated. It was visible to me the same held for all of my siblings! (I truly wish that for ALL children.)

And then there were TROPHIES! I wonder if Mom really liked the look of all those trophies in the den. As one of the three house “dusters” I did not enjoy going over, under and around all that hardware with the dust cloth. But, it did give me time to linger over them … Winners, Most Improved, Championship, Most Valuable, SCC Day Camper Award, ranging from golf to archery with so many other sports in between. It was impressive. Can you even imagine … I recall saying to a friend on a first visit to Owasco Street, “Want to see all of our trophies?”

Holidays were an equal measure of faith, fashion, food and fun! Easter … typically spring had arrived, it meant a few days off from school and Lent was almost over. I have a strong memory of playing in the side yard, but as the 2pm hour approached, we were called to the living room and Mom read the First Friday Gospel. We often had new outfits (perhaps the first clothing purchase since Christmas) and Easter Sunday mass was celebrated before there was any hunting for Easter baskets.

Thanksgiving bubbles up feelings of coziness and oh the smells! It was a day that often (not always) began with mass and once home it was all about FOOD and football. Mom was an artist setting the table so beautifully, it felt like we were royalty. We dressed for dinner and used both good china and our best manners. That day especially, saying grace felt significant as we often went around the table to share our special gratitude. Oh Dad …!

The Christmas season began with Advent and each evening the candle was lit and the appropriate prayer read aloud. Even with all that reverence, Dad found a way to make us giggle with his pronunciation. (Bob has both the advent ring and the red book.) Christmas Eve was often a spaghetti dinner with the parents and siblings exchange gifts happening over desert. It was amazing and helped to tamper the growing anticipation of the next day. Stockings were hung on the curvy front staircase and there were always two trees – the adults in the living room and the kids in the playroom (later to be relocated to under the front staircase). In hindsight I remember Mom sitting in “her chair” in the den creating lists and having cryptic conversations with Dad. I cannot imagine bringing the joy and magic of Christmas to ten children – but they did and joyfully. Both Mom and Dad enjoyed the gift exchange of Christmas as well. Dad loved opening presents and he always purchased so many gorgeous clothes for Mom that she would have her one-woman fashion show. We cheered!

Yes, there were “Name-Day Parties” and “Boys Parties” along with proms, graduations, weddings, showers and BABIES. There were so many reasons to celebrate and there still are today. It seems to me that like the migrating birds – “we” Ringwoods always seem to fly toward each other at the end of each year for a Ringwood Christmas Party – no matter what day/month it is celebrated.

(Pause … I hope that each of you share some of the special traditions that have been carried down or grown organically with your own families in the comment section below.)

MEMORIAL

Save Our Sports

August 13, 1978: Dad’s death, was laced with shock and longing and utter sadness. And yet, in true fashion that was emblematic of Mom’s strength and Dad’s incredible presence and legacy, a couple of memorials were born. At that time, the community was struggling with the school budget. The newspaper and radio carried stories of the possibility of canceling Auburn School District sports. An organization called “Save our Sports” (SOS) spearheaded by Chuck Savage, was formed. Upon Dad’s death, Mom requested that in honor of Dad (and in lieu of flowers) donations be sent to support SOS! That coming school year – sports were saved. In fact, so much money was donated in Dad’s name that, with a budget including sports balanced, the remaining funds were returned to Mom. Mom and Paul used that money to establish the AHS Ringwood Award!

(Reflection: A number of years later, Paul Ringwood Sr. was inducted into the AHS Athletic Hall of Fame.)

AHS: The Ringwood Award

June 1979 “The Ringwood Award” was first presented to a graduating male/female that participated in three sports. To date (2023) over $20,000 has been awarded to the winning students. It exists as one of the most generous and prestigious Auburn High School Athletic scholarships. Bob Ringwood and Ryan Ringwood both won the award. In 2013 the scholarship was renamed the Paul & Joan Ringwood Award. Brother Paul has been instrumental in funding this scholarship and serves as the presenter at the annual banquet.

Ringwood Award Great Race – Family Short Course Winner

In 1998 (honoring the 20th anniversary of Dad’s death) a Ringwood Trophy was established to be given to the winner of the “Family – Short Course” category. This was another joint Mom and Paul effort to honor local families just having FUN in the Great Race.

Holland Stadium Memorial Tree and Plaque

In honor of Dad’s birthday, a beautiful Crimson King tree (strong, tall, hardy and with maroon leaves) was planted at Holland Stadium. It was originally placed near the football stadium field where Dad once suited up as the school quarterback. Later, it moved to the pathway above the stadium seating. Thanks to Jack, the plaque states:

Lemoyne College Memorial Tree and Plaque

Mom loved Lemoyne College; she was proud of her Jesuit education, social work degree and her lifelong friends. As each Ringwood child approached college age, Mom found multiple ways of suggesting the benefits of a Lemoyne education. David listened to her and followed her footsteps both as a student, educator and Lemoyne employee. Like Mom, he gave it his heart! Unlike Dad, there was really no shock to Mom’s heavenly departure on February 12, 2012 … but still that heavy and profound sadness. She is a whole lot to miss. David, in his quiet and thoughtful way worked with Lemoyne College to secure a special spot outside the Lemoyne Chapel for a stunning magnolia tree and plaque to honor Mom.

(Worth Noting: I just recently learned that this tree and plaque was coupled with a sizable donation to the college – selflessly given by David.)

Ringwood Golf Tournament

For many years there was talk of “Sisters Weekend” or the “Boys Golf Weekend” but that changed in 2012. Following Mom’s death, and without big formalities, we created the Ringwood Golf Tournament: Team #1: Nancy, Mike, Patty (Captain), Tom & Jack VS Team #2: Teresa (Captain), Paul, David, Peter & Bob. It is scheduled for the end of September with two rounds of golf, coffee at the cemetery, lasagna around the dinner table and endless laughs, ribbing and FUN! And yes, there is a TROPHY!

I come my end - but a beginning for your thoughts and next generation celebrations and memorials. It was important to me that these thoughts hit print during this week of August 13. I was committed to having this done before the September 2024 Ringwood Golf Tournament. A big thanks goes out to Paul and David for sitting around the table last April, eating PBJ sandwiches and running through these thoughts.

With love,

-Teresa, Paul, David (August 2024)

(Request: Look through those Ringwood albums that I made years ago. If you find any photos that you feel fit this blog, take a picture of the picture and send them to me. I will add!)